Tasers , Everybody Needs Good Tasers.

Ahhh, Friday afternoon. A time to come home from work, relax, and look forward to 2 days off..............
WRONG!
Well, today, at least, I was wrong. (only for a little while, I'm not usually wrong for very long) 

Although this particular Friday afternoon seemed to be a regular one as I arrived home, it rapidly shifted to a WTFriday afternoon.

While relaxing outside in the shade of the backyard patio, I noticed about 3 people approaching the fence from the house behind mine. When I say I could see "people", I mean the tops of their heads, because that's all I could see given my seated position, the slope of the yards, and the height & structure of the fence. So really, there could've been 3 tallish people and 100 persons of miniature stature for all I know.

Anyway...... a woman poked her nose over the top of the fence and called out "hullo?" to me. After replying "Hi", I approached the fence.

She began to tell me a strange little tale, that I found hard to process at first, and, frankly am still struggling with.

From my worn out, heat-exhausted, Friday afternoon brain, this is what I can recall....

"hullo......I'm real sorry about my nephew trying to break in to your house, he was locked out and couldn't get in, but he is my nephew and sorry if he was breaking in, but your husband yelled out "WHAT ARE YOU UP TO!?" and yeah ....sorry."

Now you can see where the WTF element comes into it.

Naturally, me being...well...me, I just kind of nodded and said "umm, oook, thanks." , which, now that I have had time to reflect, adds another drop of WTF. " Thanks" ????? What??? Thanks for telling me? Thanks that your nephew tried to break in but didn't succeed?? Thanks for moving in and introducing yourself to me this way? Come on Rach....learn to communicate!!

 " ...but he was locked out...." Of course he was! It's not his house!

So anyway, that was that. I walked calmly back inside, locked the door behind me, then proceeded to run madly around the entire house checking all windows & doors, all ok. Then I started on all the valuable stuff...computers, tv's, game consoles, my chocolate stash! Nothing looked as though it had been through an attempted break-in.

Then I started thinking...."...your husband yelled...".....another splash of WTF. Where was this mysterious new husband? An even better question, was he hot? In my confusion of the conversation with The Neighbours, I'd forgotten to get a description of my new man. Dammit!

Another thought then presented itself. Be glad you didn't disclose the true nature of your relationship status, Rachel.....because if they think there is a man living here, and obviously home during the day, then maybe this 'nephew' & his associates will leave you alone. It also occurred to me maybe they were fishing for information about who lives here, just for future reference, so hopefully I didn't give anything away. ( suddenly I can hear a voice in my head calling me Captain Paranoid - you know who you are! :-P )

So there you have it. I didn't call the police, because really, what could I tell them?....." um hi, some weirdos have moved in behind me and have apologised for an attempted break-in of which I can see no signs....yes I live in Morayfield" *click* "hullo, hullo???.........."